


Fuck me hardly with a chainsaw

by Rainbow_of_death27



Category: Heathers
Genre: Breakup, Don't judge I'm a weird child, Heather Chandler in..... love?, Heathers - Freeform, Love, Other, The weeds, chainsaws, female oc - Freeform, first fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 17:18:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16223708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbow_of_death27/pseuds/Rainbow_of_death27
Summary: Heather Chandler gets a new boyfriend and it leaves her friends questioning her menial health.





	Fuck me hardly with a chainsaw

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone, this is my first fic, I really hope you enjoy it. Thanks so much for reading kisses♡.

"I'm going on a hot date tonight, so I can't bring you to your little thing Heather" Heather Chandler said. 

"But I got hit by a car! I need to go to the hospital! And I don't have a car!" Heather Duke exclaimed 

"Well then get someone else to drive you. I'm to busy tonight. 

"To busy to help your own friend!?" 

"Heather don't ask questions you already know the awnser. Look I got to go, just ask Heather if she can drive you" Heather Chandler said and walked out the door. 

*At the restraint* 

When Heather walked up into the restraint she saw her date. -It was a chainsaw with a bow tie on it- Heather walked to the table and sat down. "Hey stud" she said as she kissed it's metal plaiting, it stayed scilent. "Oh you" Heather giggled. "So how was your day?" Heather asked. The chainsaw being a chainsaw stayed scilent. "I know Stacys such a bitch and Brad seems like a nice guy but I feel like he should work more" Heather said. (Oh and BTW there are a lot of people around the restraint looking at Heather and her.... date? Like she's a phyco). 

A young waitress around 20 (named Ashley) came to their table looking nervous and started to speak "Umm.... may I take your order?" 

"Yes. Babe you go first" Heather asked. After about 40 seconds of silents she continued "and I'll have a small salid". 

Ashley starred at them, then spoke "Mm, c-could you please r-repeat that?" She said sounding even more nervous. 

Heather looked at her confused "Umm sure. I'll have a small salid and what did you want again babe?" The chainsaw stayed silent once again. 

"Ummmm I-I" Ashley stammered. 

"Oh my god! Do I have to spell it out for you!?" Heather yelled. 

Ashley stayed silent. "Jesusfuckingcrist! a S-M-A-L-L S-A-L-I-D and a L-A-R-G-E S-T-A-K-E, there did you fucking get that!?" 

"Y-yes. Of course, r-right away, sorry" Ashley frantically got the fuck out of there. 

"Well Jesus did she have a-" Heather stopped being mad and started getting excited "brain tumor for breakfast." She pointed at the chainsaw and laughed "Oh my god it's like we're on the same wave link". She kissed the chainsaw on its chainsaw type face. "Oh you're so adorable when you blush" Heather giggled. 

They.... talked? I guess until they got their food. "Here you lovely people are" Ashley said a lot more relaxed (she probably had a weed brake). 

"Took you long enough!.... What? But I-" Heather sighed "ok fine I'm....sorry. Thank you for the food" Heather said begrudgingly. She frowned but when she saw the chainsaws lovely.... smile? (Ya we're going to go with that) she smiled back. Once they finished eating, they paid and started to walk home. When they got to Heathers house they hugged "I can't believe how amazing you are, see you later" she kissed him and he left, she sighed happily and went up to her room. 

*Two days later* 

Veronica and Heather McNamara were laying on the couch when Heather Chandler stormed in "Motherfucker!" She yelled and sat down next to the two. 

"Hi Heather!" Heather McNamara said happily. 

"Da fuck do you want!?!?" Heather Chandler yelled back. 

Heather McNamara started tearing up, Heather Chandlers face soffend, and she put her arm around Heather McNamara "I'm sorry ok? I'm just a little pissed right now, I'm sorry that I yelled". 

Heather McNamara wiped away her tears "It's ok, what are you so mad about if you don't mind me asking?" 

"You know that shit stick that I've been dating? Heather Chandler asked 

"Y-yessssss?" Veronica said nervously 

Heather Chandler started again "Well guess what? He gave me god dam AIDS!" 

Veronica and Heather McNamara both looked at each other and asked in unison "Wait, what?" 

"That asshole gave me AIDS!" Heather Chandler yelled 

Veronica looked at Heather McNamara and sighed deeply "Oh god I guess I have to do this. Um Heather" She turned to her "listen to me very closely. That chainsaw is a-" 

"A god damn bitch!" Heather Chandler said. 

Veronica continued "Well yes" 

"Damn straight" Heather Chandler whispered under her breath 

"Anyway Heather, that chainsaw.... is just a chainsaw.... Y-you know?" 

"An inadament object" Heather McNamara chimed in. 

"What are you guys talking about? He's as real as my boobs". 

Veronica sighed again "You see Heather that's my point" 

Heather Chandler looked contemplative. Then there was a knock at the door. "I'll get it" Heather Chandler said sadly. When she opened the door it was the chainsaw. 

Veronica and Heather McNamara looked at each other in confusion. "What the fuck do you want!?..... no you asshole dick twitch.... You know what I can't even with you! I'm going to my room!!!!" Heather Chandler stopped upstairs and slammed the door. 

"Well bye guys" The chainsaw spoke sadly and rolled away.


End file.
